As I write this (on the Sunday before your first birthday), you are in Santa Cruz with your grandparents (Bhavanas parents). Youll be back home tonight. It is now always depressing to come home to an empty room at home and to wake up without you next to me. (Or get woken up by your mom because youve decided that 5 am is a good enough time to be awake and your mom needs a little extra sleep!) As I sit on the computer and write this out, there are so many memories of the past year that came flooding in.
Like the first few days after your birth when you didnt know how to take in milk. I wondered about how youd learn and how youd get your mothers milk. Luckily, as I should have known then, just when we thought something was an issue, youd surprise us with your learnability. (I still worry how youll ever learn to sleep on your own you need your mummy to pat you to sleep! Please surprise us soon.)
Like the day about a month ago when I saw you walk for the first time. You looked just like those babies they show in the TV ads! Walking brought you a new world to explore. Suddenly, your world became so much bigger. You had already been crawling in early November, but this ability to walk has transformed your space. Later that day, I held your little hand and we walked together from one end of the house to the other. Of course, you didnt need to hold my hand. It was just me helping you explore a bit of the world around. As Bhavana had said sometime ago when she was admonishing me for not spending enough time with you, Spend the time now with him rather than sitting on the computer. Soon, he will not need you. Maybe, I wanted to reassure myself that you still did. But in that instant as we walked, I knew you had become bigger and I had become a little older.
Like the trips that we have taken together. To Rajasthan, Chennai and Surat. (You also went once for a couple days with your mom to Pune.) It is always fun traveling with you. It gives me a lot more time with you. The Chennai trip in February was special. I took you out that afternoon since your mother was busy in another function. We went to Spencers Plaza. We spent time in Landmarks buying a small bag for you. Then, as I bought a Bluetooth dongle for myself in one of the shops, you fell in love with the small calculator at the shop. And started yelling for it. So, I went and got you that little calculator which you held closely for the next hour. You and I then had lunch together a dosa. Then, as we made our way back to where we were staying in the rickshaw, you fell asleep sitting on my lap. I didnt even realise it for some time I was talking and showing you the things around. It was the first time I had managed to put you to sleep.
Like the times when youve fallen sick, and there have been more than a few occasions. I dont worry about those too much I know you are resilient enough to overcome. But we still worry. The time recently when the pediatrician mentioned you had eczema. The name sounded so threatening. The time when we thought you were teething when you spent the entire night crying many months ago. Well, we are still waiting for your teeth to show up! The early days when you just didnt know how to fall asleep. Your mummy would hold you in innumerable positions and put you in the jhula (swing) and wed heave a collective sigh of relief when youd fall asleep. Every day.
Tomorrow: Your Mom and You
TECH TALK Father to Son+T